Russians eat the blood of their enemies

A great treat for kids, "Gematogen" (Hematogen) also comes in honey flavor

And their enemies are cows.  "Hematogen" candy bars contain 5% cow blood, and consumers of the Tootsie Roll-textured treat describe a "metallic twang".   This is not just a reward enjoyed by conquering Red Army soldiers after they have slaughtered the enemy, this is a doctor-recommended supplement for millions of school kids, or at least it was, prior to the fall of the Soviet Union.

Delicious (and HIV-free)
Fear not, risk-loving consumers - Hematogen, while less popular these days, is still manufactured, and readily available in Russia and the United States.  If you live in New York City, you can pick it up at your local apteka (pharmacy), but if you are on Amazon Prime, help yourself to 24 two-ounce bars for 50 bucks.  It's just defibrinated bovine blood, (probably) micropore filtered while leaving in all that great heme iron to perk you up and get you going. 

Why our local Safeway refuses to stock it is beyond me - They have rows and rows of 5-Hour Energy, which contains 0% blood but plenty of other things like caffeine and megadose vitamins/amino acids guaranteed to kill you (13 deaths since 2009). 

In any event, the epcats haven't updated their website since January, and the recall-2019 team will be camped outside the post office so often in the coming weeks they will start to gel in the cold like diesel fuel, so why not rev their motors with a tasty, chewy blood bar?


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