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Showing posts from August, 2018

Because they were a little "Luz" with food prep

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Another great eating place closed because of those meddlesome restaurant inspectors.

Thanks goodness no pikas were involved

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Maybe we can scatter the pikas honoring these three gentlemen near a barn.

Chop House? More like Flop House.

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Oh boy, it's restaurant inspection time again, and another Estes Park bastion of "where should we eat?" bites the dust.  Smells like dead roaches.

I foresee a bronze shortage

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In other parts of the world, this is a horribly depressing number.  In Estes Park, this is just a chance to cast 301 more pika sculptures.

Wow, we may start to run out of room for all the pikas in front of the Old Church Shops

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Both of the Estes Park men who sexually abused 14-year-old Margaret Baldwin back in 1917 were active members of the local Community Church.  We gave one of them a pika, why not welcome Bill Hybels into the pika fold?

Town officials could take a field trip there, and include a sculptor in the travel party

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These crimes these individuals committed are horrific, but no more horrific than raping a 14-year-old girl, as two Estes Park older unmarried men were accused of in 1917, with one sent to the penitentiary.  We currently honor the 60-year-old of the pair smart enough and wealthy enough to mount an "effective" defense ("The girl lies, all girls lie, yes, I can see she is pregnant, yes, other people just testified that I held her on my lap back in my darkroom, but maybe the wind made her pregnant...") capable of convincing 12 of his male friends to forgive him.  Sure, sure, the girl died a year later in a reform school, her only crime that of being passed around like a sex doll between two perverts, but, hey, everyone has skeletons in their closet, even skeletons of sex toys.

Fear Not, Gabriel, Estes Park is judgment free and pika/pedo friendly

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Please let us know where you would like us to place your pika, so that kids can search for it.  Maybe in your pants?  That's a joke.  We generally just place the pedophile pikas high up above a store entrance, so that we can look under the little girls' dresses.  Ha-ha.  Just kidding.  We don't need to place them up high, because we place mirrors on the sidewalk.  Estes Park, best mountain town according to Sunset magazine, and best place to honor sexual predators, according to those we rescue from the garbage dump of forgotten history.  William T. Parke would be so proud, Gabriel, to shake your hand and give you some pointers about how to entice 14-year-old girls to sit on your lap.

Our Man In The Street - Bigger Is Not Necessarily Better

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Bigger is not necessary better.  I'm referring to the new updated and expanded Safeway.  The checkout lines are still too long, with closed stands.  The aisles are still crowded with clerks stocking shelves, a job which should be done at night.  Also, the parking lot is jammed with delivery trucks blocking parking spots.  Last Friday, a beer truck was blocking 10 to 12 parking spots at 8:30 a.m.  Deliveries should be made off-hours, or away from the customer parking area.  The shelves for three items I purchase on a regular basis (for ice cream, cheese, and breakfast sandwiches) were empty.  What's new?  The only "improvements" I noted were an expanded beer section and a larger deli.  I assume both are to better serve tourists, not locals.  Being a skeptic, I also believe the "improvements" were made mainly to discourage competition.  Have you ever seen a less-friendly bunch of employees in a business supposedly catering to the public?  Bring on King Soope

Maybe if staff stopped spitting in the pot luck

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So the YMCA used to be a safe go-to place if you wanted to at least curtail diarrhea output from a steady diet of downtown noshing, but no more.  Oh the humanity.  Dear Lord, thank you for this meal, bacterial laden and heated to substandard temperature.  Please keep us from running to the bathroom too often in the next 24-48 hours.  Amen.

One-way flights leaving Denver tomorrow for Rome - $1035

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If you're a parent, you pray to God this is Nutella

So all local government officials are now on notice

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Urban Meyer is a paid employee of land-grant university, meaning taxpayers are paying his salary (plus Adidas, or whoever outfits the team). Estes Park people in position of power, as of August 1, 2018, you are officially on notice that William T. Parke was a pedophile, and sexually abused one Esther Margaret Baldwin, age 14.  Either William T. Parke or another suspect impregnated her.  What are you going to do about these indisputable facts, besides continue to deny them?