Baghdad Today article from 2089: "Indeed, I recall it well," said 108-year-old curmudgeon Arthur "Mess in Pants" Messal of Estes Park, Western Iraqn, population 3, who actually claimed to be donning a shirt for the first time in six months at the behest of the reporter, who preferred not to see any more of those floppy things. "It was for a town trustee named Cody Rex Walker, and I crafted most of the twitter (an ancient form of harassment) hashtags for the recall group," Messal gasped out, between pauses for breath. "#CorruptCody, #ClownCouncilor, #CowboyBoob, those were some of my best ones. We actually didn't have any reason to recall this individual, we were just bored, and our sex parties up at Good Sams (a place where local retirees spent their golden years engaged mostly in complaint) were starting to get stale." Following the failed recall attempt, all the 454 people who signed the recall petition departed Estes Park for Sun City, Arizona, except for Messal, who continued to stick around in order to berate Crossroads Ministry as a likely haven for defrocked priests and drug-dealing cops. "I was all for the FEMA flood plain map," Messal mused, which no one left alive in the former U.S. state of Colorado had any idea what any of his words meant. Eventually, according to Wikipedia microfilms, Mayor Reuben Bergsten of Estes Park raised water rates so much to pay for his 17th speed boat that anyone with sense moved to nearby Vail, where property taxes and sales taxes were 95% lower. "I stuck around because Betty continued to promise me a hot fudge sundae and a rusty trombone," Messal rambled, again using terminology that is no longer translatable from any extant dictionary, unless it represents the ravings of a madman. Besides Messal, the two other remaining residents of Estes Park include a Bill Pinkham hologram, who appointed himself as Hospital Board president for life back in 2026, even though there was no hospital left, and a Captain Crunch re-enactor, still a popular cereal in the colony despite the replacement of all foods by yeast-generated substitutes during the reign of Cheb Khaled.
Here's an interesting fact from the recall that preceded that recall. Voters chose to recall David Habecker by a count of 903 recall to 605 keep in office, a total of 1508 votes cast. Interestingly, four candidates chose to place their names on the special election ballot: Richard Homeier, John Ericson, Dorothea Sloan, and Garry Bloom. These candidates received votes as follows: Homeier 466, Ericson 337, Sloan 249, and Bloom 190. This is a total of 1242 votes cast. Potentially, 1242-903 = 339 votes for candidates by voters answering the recall question were cast by folks who wanted to keep David Habecker in office. They wanted to keep David Habecker in office, yet they voted for a candidate to replace him. I trust that Eric Blackhurst knows this kind of thing happens, and will vigorously campaign to not have people who wish to retain Cody Rex Walker vote for him, but rather make the distinction that people who wish to retain Cody Rex Walker should not fill out the lower half of their ballot.
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