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Showing posts from 2022

Ya think?

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That's Estes Park for you. When they have a chance to get nothing but positive publicity from stepping up and doing what every Colorado community should be doing, but very few Colorado communities besides Estes Park have the money and space and volunteer workforce to be doing, you let your racism and false exceptionalism shine through.

Three years ago

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Didya ever think we would be at the cusp of a New Year with 587 deaths from a trash piece of RNA in little ole Larimer County, once COVID arrived on our shores in March 2020? Three years ago, we were welcoming the New Year in complete ignorance of what was brewing in China, soon to arrive in the U.S. Well, most of us were. I wasn't. But it is hard to convince people that something is vastly different from risks overblown before. People are skeptical of anything that they can't see with their own eyes, or have presented to them as real by someone they viciously dislike. I would say most people reading this would belittle the number 587, as if it was no different from deaths due to car accidents or strokes or heart disease or pneumonia. Of course, our life expectancy in the U.S. has decreased since 2020, our replacement rate in various states of the union is at risk of further tottering into negativity (meaning more people are dying in Alabama, for example, than birth occ...

The Big Nothing

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If we can just talk this problem away, we have solved the problem. -Estes Park Town Trustees Now that Larimer County has passed the buck on housing or helping migrants newly arrived into Colorado, what is Estes Park going to do to step up and offer assistance? Or are we just going to mouth the same excuses, wish everyone the best, and not step up to the plate? This time of year in Estes Park, there are plenty of hotel rooms available, plenty of restaurants with open tables, plenty of retired folks with time on their hands, and, from the latest reports, a town obviously flush with cash, or we wouldn't be allocating another $1 million to a road project without batting an eye. What is more important - Human lives or roads? Human lives or comprehensive plans? Human lives or sales tax collection? We have zero burden in Estes Park with homeless folks, because we provide no safety net, especially on weekends, and chase them elsewhere. We are effectively insulating ourselves fro...

Is the Estes Park EDC more like the EDSeeWeToldYouSo?

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Ten years ao, the EPEDC sprang from the loins of Partners for Commerce, back when that was a thing, before we resurrected the Chamber of Horrors, after Citizens for Responsible Frottage collapsed under the sheer weight of the orgy pile. It was just another club for those with too many "let's put on a show" ideas and not enough safe outlets like wood-burning to form or join, only joining this one required $20K of extortion money to keep the infighting from spilling over into the public eye, and for investing in anal beads, probably, who knows. A decade of no tangible accomplishments beyond pumping each other up has caused a few cracks in the facade, though, and the EDCs two resident swell heads have recently carried over their mouth f***ing to the town bulletin board, for reasons unclear. This is all a bit hard to decipher - Is the hospital running out of money again for Country Club dues, or do they want folks like Kevin to go away and stop meddling in their fun? ...

Space Needle Fireworks Coming to Estes Park

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Visit Estes Park is happy to announce that the Seattle fireworks display which in times past has been the highlist of New Year's Eve in the Emerald City is moving to Estes Park. "We just wanted to keep the same vibe going in a totally different location, dudes," VEP advisor Scott Handerburger was quoted as saying from high atop temporary scaffolding erected in Bond Park. "Naturally, we will have to build an exact replica of the Space Needle, but as long as the funky vibe is maintained, it's all good," he added, lighting up a giant doobie. As this article went to press, indications were that Estes Park was also in the running to host America's Cup, as long as it promised to construct an ocean nearby.

As predicted

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This is getting a bit tiresome, me being correct all the time and no one besides me utilizing this amazing ability to correctly predict the future to get rich on stocks and dump crypto.

Estes Park reaches 3000

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Don't kid yourself, all Larimer County employees took a break the entire Thanksgiving week, and when this is updated next month or next year, Estes Park will have surpassed 3000 cases of SARS-CoV-2, in all its variant glory. Deaths to follow, stay tuned (here, because no other media outlet will cover this): This is either half of Estes Park's population, or 1/3 or 1/10, depending on how much our Town Administrator wants to hide it.

Dirdy pumkins

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To the editor: The free pumpkins given away to all Estes Park school children by local merchants and service organizations prior to Halloween is indeed a long tradition, and one worthy of commemoration and praise. The most recent article in the Estes Park Blues mentions the tradition dates back to 1936 and Ron Brodie. I would contend that while Brodie Bros. did indeed start their grocery business in Estes Park in early 1936, there is no evidence the free pumpkin giveaway dates back to the first year of their arrival. Search of Estes Park newspapers from 1908 forward using the key word "pumpkin" or "pumpkins" uncovers an advertised Brodie Bros. pumpkin giveaway to the kids in the fall of 1940. Obviously, provision of the derivative pumpkin PIE as a freebie and cause for celebration extends back well before this in Colorado history, but the actual pumpkin as an object being given away for purposes of carving (or decoration or throwing or otherwise) seems to be ...

Man I wish Estes Park was more like Steamboat Springs

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No question who calls the shots in Steamboat Springs, it is the voters. Wish Estes Park had a representative government like our neighbor to the northwest. I'm not saying whether raising $14 million by finally standing up to the Short Term Rental bullies and thugs is a good thing or a bad thing, but we could sure use $14 million for the Loop right now.

The Loop is dead

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The local FLAP (Federal Lands Access Program) project affectionately known as the Infinite Loop is currently flapping in the breeze, as the only two bids submitted for construction were nearly double the estimated cost. The lowest bid submitted was 27 million dollars, and the project has been budgeted for 15.7 million. Ooops. All those Estes Park trustees who were elected and re-elected (and would probably run again in a heartbeat if not for term limits or senility) based on ramming the Loop through and taking the decision away from the people who were actually directly impacted have egg on their face, to the tune of 3000 omelettes dropped from an airplane. Oh, you silly pro-Loopers, who tore down the Donut Haus and displaced so many other residents from cabins because the Loop was unstoppable, immutable, immortal. Looks like it just got stopped. A big goopy loopy hoop ran into a brick wall. What a bunch of big-talking dreamers and well-intentioned morons we elect, what a...

Pat Washburn has died

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Pat's father was Dorr Yeager, who was married before he married Pat's mother, the daughter of Joe Mills. This first marriage didn't exist, and no children resulted from it, according to our historian laureate, who is more interested in protecting his friends' reputations than in writing actual history. I outlived Pat Washburn, and, God willing, I will outlive our historian laureate. At that point, the real truth about Estes Park and Dorr Yeager's disavowed wife and son will begin filtering out. And then, if Estes Park isn't completely brain dead, we might stop falling all over ourselves buying Dorr Yeager books, and worshipping at our historian laureate's feet.

You won't be reading this in any other newspaper or on any town website

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Another Covid-19 death in Estes Park. An 82-year-old male. I'm not claiming any connection, but here is an 82-year-old male who died of pneumonia at Estes Park Health on September 9. This individual was a physician. There are viral pneumonias, bacterial pneumonias, fungal pneumonias, and chemical pneumonias. if anyone would know this, it would be a physician. I certainly wouldn't want anyone in Estes Park to burden themselves with asking a follow-up question, or being forced to confront the reality that COVID-19 is still taking lives. Dr. Crislip died of pneumonia in the heat of summer. Makes sense. That is when pneumonia is most rampant. I certainly wouldn't want the local newspaper of record to lift a finger to look into this or even mention it beyond hitting the send button on "Congratulations to the Community Center Swimming Pool (run by a member of their editorial board) for self-citing themselves as the safest pool in the greater Estes Park area." ...

O Brave New World

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That has such SARS-CoV-2 cases in it Larimer County breaches 100,000 Estes Park finally starts slowing down a bit, but still reported over 800 new cases since April (5 months, 800 new cases)

This could have happened in Estes Park

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Meaning our newspaper of record could have interviewed winesses, instead of taking the police officer's scripted word for it. Why is rural Florida light years ahead of backwater Colorado when it comes to reporting real news, rather than sycophantic business profiles? https://www.cnn.com/2022/08/23/us/florida-postal-worker-dog-attack/index.html

Is now a good time to buy?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3GiJiMhuY4k

Welcome to the start of WW2.0

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Remember the Maine https://www.thedailybeast.com/darya-dugina-daughter-of-putin-propagandist-alexander-dugin-killed-in-car-bomb-reports-say

Why do we live in a town

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Where our local government and (toilet) "paper of record" does NOTHING to alert us to the fact that our (failed) police dog (who we had to bow down and worship at the initiation of the silly vanity program two years ago) nearly killed an innocent woman two weeks ago? This attack on an innocent individual happened two weeks ago. Two weeks ago. Two weeks ago. A check of the Trail-Gashithole webhole shows nothing more than the latest Dick Dunderhead column about tractor love and puff pieces on the wine festival. Who thought it was a good idea to sit on this story? The only thing our mayor should be sitting on right now is a toilet, to flush out the hidden agendas and budgetary excesses she routinely swallows for the illiterate, anus worshipping masses. For shame. For shame. For shame. Repeat and wash the foul taste out of your mouths 1000 times. An innocent woman nearly died from a police K9 dog attack, and the town is somehow collectively attempting to spike this h...

Surfin' U.S.A.

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Google the California town without a direct shout-out in this Beach Boys hit, but with multiple indirect references. Then you will understand the text pasted below, something the town has effectively K-boshed for two weeks running.

As promised, your Colorado monkeypox dashboard

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Stay up to date on how many locals will immediately deny this is an actual disease that can cause actual harm. Enjoy how, when the recommendation comes out to stop giving smallpox-infested blankets to Native Americans, they start stocking smallpox-infected blankets in their stores. I can't wait for Bent Dick to weigh in and make his prediction on cumulative cases by 2024. Another Nobel prize in physiology or medicine in his future... https://cdphe.colorado.gov/diseases-a-to-z/monkeypox

Why shop local?

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Currently, Safeway has the cheapest gas in Estes Park (Loaf and Jug is 10 cents cheaper if you want to give them all your private information and be harrassed repeatedly by text and email) at $4.69 per gallon, which is about like saying Idaho Central Community College has the 375th ranked football program among division III schools. it is nothing to brag about, and, indeed, makes you wonder if Safeway execs enjoy pulling the wings off of flies, as much as they are raping guests and locals alike. Of course, Estes Park residents are stupid for even bothering to purchase more than 1 gallon of gasoline anywhere inside Estes Park. Lyons is presently 80 cents a gallon cheaper, and right now, as of Wednesday, August 10, 2022, three stations near the main Longmont exit off of I-25 are selling regular unleaded gasoline (85 octane) at $2.95 a gallon. This bears repeating, because I fear some of my readership is too timid to react unless being shouted at: GASOLINE IN LONGMONT IS CURRENTLY $...

This kettle of fish is fragrant

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And it is up to you decide if this is fragrant in a good way. 3000 by September or bust.

Hello Larimer County - Welcome to Monkeypox

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Just wondering - Monkeypox is not techinically (only) a sexually tranmitted infection, but rather one spread by close, prolonged contact. Still, would any former Chamber of Commerce head who violated every sane tenet of how to deal with COVID-19, especially violating the tenet of how not to behave when you got it by willfully spreading it to family members (with or without their approval or signed release forms), now feel compelled to bugger their offspring to "get this over with"?

Wanna race?

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Remember way back in 2020 when Estes Park had 37 cases of COVID? Ah, the wonder years, when we wondered how many of Donna Carlson's family members were contributing to this total. Now, Colorado has reached another milestone, 37 monkeypox cases, and the general attitude among locals has been an indifferent and frankly concerning "What's monkeypox, and how can I get a federal monkeypox loan to pay the salary of workers I don't actually have on my payroll, or keep the hospital afloat"? Oh, Bent Dick Turd Ferguson is on Facebook claiming he already predicted in advance, back in 2010, that monkeypox would re-emerge and reach 37 Colorado cases by July 2022, and telling folks you can get vaccinated if you want, he wouldn't, but that is up to you, although he wouldn't, and your are probably a f**** moron for doing so, because he wouldn't, but that is up to you (he wouldn't) - he trained at Johnny Walkers, which is not Johns Hopkins but damn close if y...

I'm sure there 's an interesting story behind this

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I'm guessing this is in La Salle County, Illinois, but I have no idea why the story first appeared in French in an Ottawa, Canada, on-line newspaper. The La Salle County Sheriff's Office said Thursday that Ryan A. Rhodes, 31, was arrested for threatening a public official, a Class 3 felony that carries a sentence of 5 to 10 years in prison. Rhodes was taken to La Salle County Jail, where he arrived on Thursday. This investigation was conducted by the La Salle County Sheriff's Office Investigations Division. Update: Because Ryan A. Rhodes is from Ottawa, Illinois. I still don't get the French connection, though (if you are having trouble following this train, copy and paste the link below in your browser): https://news-24.fr/un-homme-dottawa-arrete-au-colorado-pour-avoir-menace-un-juge-shaw-local/

Chugging towards 3000

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By September, Estes Park, population 6000, will easily reach 3000 COVID cases. We breached 2000 back in April of this year, and we are adding an average of 250 cases per month. This no longer represents the weekly re-infection of Donna Carlson, as she is now Colorado Springs' problem. This is (subtracting Donna Carlson's 1000 cases) 2000 actual Estes Park residents out of 6000 actual town of Estes Park residents who have had COVID. That is not what we are telling the public, however. We just expand the denominator to act like everything is ship-shape. Keep up the good work of expanding Estes Park's ghost population, which is now at 250,000 (we decided to include the outlying Estes Park suburbs of Longmont and Windsor so the case count per 1000 remains low), TA Machaholic. We will get through this, whether complicit board members have to kill us all in order to save us.

Routt County is Steamboat Springs

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The idea that Monkeypox could someone spread throughout Colorado defies all common logic. This is not a disease transmitted through airborne particles or suspensions, it is something that takes major, thorough contact to transmit. Plus, we should now all be attuned to any constellation of viral symptoms followed by a rash. Let's not let another easily diagnosed and defeated virus run rampant through our ignorant, bull-headed populace. How about we just decide right now to get vaccinated if necessary, take our viral meds if necessary, and stay the hell away from superspreader events for the time being. Or, why don't we just admit we are too selfish as a country to do any of these things, and prepare for a good-old fashioned monkeypox outbfreak.

Jason Van Tatenhove sworn in at 1:15 p.m. Mountain Time

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This is a big deal, even if the Trail-Gazette pretends it isn't.

Live feed from January 6 Congressional hearings - 12:27 p.m. Mountain Time

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Jason Van Tatenhove is on the right. Likely going to begin testifying after hearing resumes (there was a short "10 minute" recess after opening statements and congressional testimony with lots of video highlights which has extended to 20 minutes and counting).

Estes Park's own to testify in D.C. today

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Jason Van Tatenhove is sheduled to testify at the January 6 insurrection hearings today on Capitol Hill. Jason is the first local resident to make national political headlines since ever. (We could insert Enos Mills pre-radio and television, but that requires advance notification of our Historian Laureate, who has right of first refusal on anything related to Estes Park's history.) The Trail will not be covering this event, opting instead to post another video of chipmunks running across the road.

Sprinkle on another 20,000

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20,000 deaths was something all sane U.S. citizens would have shrunk from in horror at the start of the pandemic. It was just too gruesome to contemplate. Now, 20,000 deaths on top of the 1 million already racked up are treated by the grifters and deniers as just piling on, beating a dead horseman, so to speak. So enjoy your extra 20,000, filthy MAGA-ites. It's just the spice on top of a death stew you continue stirring and stirring while Rome (GA) and Ithaca (NY) and York (PA) and Berlin (TX) burn.

What a tragedy

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If this poor individual had died of COVID, the Trail would at least have had an excuse not to cover her demise. Obviously not a GOOD excuse, but John Cullen's disapproval carries a lot of weight financially. He wags a finger, we file away another recipe for fried chicken. As it is, once again, the Trail seems to drag its tail on reporting anything of significance happening in the area. People die out here, people embezzle out here, people peddle underage girls out here, people exploit the working immigrant population out here by packing them in like sardines and overcharging them for rent, and none of that is worth scaring the tourists over. The Trail used to at least pretend to want to be the reporter first on the scene in a town with no legitimate competition. Now they just farm everything out to Jibber Jabber and News 9 in Denver.

Big County, Big Results

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When will our former superintendent stop applying for positions and actually start thinking about returning to Estes Park? Returning some of his hush fund money, that is. We clearly overestimated his ability to swing a big stick. He can't even find gainful employment in Craig. Craig is like the Craigslist of Colorado towns, if Craiglist was entirely devoted to selling raw sewage. We taxpayers handed him a huge goodbye bonus because there were no jobs left to apply for at the time of his release (supposedly), yet he has already applied for three jobs and for some reason, these tiny-minded boards all keep finding and hiring candidates who are much less qualified and much more concerned about something other than the kids, which is the Sheldon m.o. (and no, that doesn't mean money order, and no, I am not advocating starting a GoFundMe as it becomes clearer and clearly we backed the wrong horse for 8 years and then gave him a big bonus so-long bribe like he had just won the Ke...

Time to Zoom

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30 cases per day in our little snowglobe is nothing to sneeze at, or cough at, or ventilate on.

Out of control

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Estes Park, welcome to your worst nighmare

To wit

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Remember a few days ago when I said "deaths to follow"? Remember when I said the Trail wouldn't be the source of this information? At some point, Larimer County will have to remove this pesky dashboard. Because Tom Godhelpus sure isn't talking about how deaths from COVID continue to be reported in Larimer County. Well, in fairness, he is, after you scroll down about thirty pages to see one paragraph blaming it on late reporting from May. Covid-19 is still killing people in Estes Park, whether Estes Park wants to admit it or not. Imagine if some Republican was running around killing people in Estes Park, to the tune of 19 murders in two years. You think the Trail would run and hide behind that explosive story? Tim is probably dealing with repeated bouts of explosive diarrhea. Whatever the excuse is, you can forget about your death from COVID being covered locally. The Stanley says that is bad business, and we wouldn't want to hurt flat Stanley. On a relat...

This is what happens when you don't take SARS-CoV-2 seriously

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And when your noodle-spined paper of record allows idiots to flood the comments section on FB with non-scientific, idiot fever dreams. Vaccinated yet, Bent Dick Turd Ferguson? 200 cases of COVID-19 per month over the last two months. Deaths to invariably follow, invariably ignored by the Trail. The highest number of cases per month in Estes Park since the outbreak began. Safe and effective vaccines, anyone? Naw, the Trail is too busy endlessly fighting Trump courtesy of Howard Hand Job Hansel and glorifying tractors via our resident (lone) cowboy Vic Tater Anderson.

What a croc

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There was no need for this program, there was never a need for this program, and anyone who clapped when "Diego" the K9 slumdog millionaire was introduced at town hall should be ashamed of themselves. Turns out he was only useful (barely) in Greeley and Loveland. Thanks, Estes Park taxpayers, for helping out other jurisdictions. What a snow job, attempting to sell this boondoggle to the public as an absolute necessity, and now admitting how silly it was for a town of 6000 people to waste a million dollars training and feeding a show dog. What did we get out of it? Two years of never even making public appearances, and being yelled at to "Stay away from this highly-trained machine" when you unknowingly wandered within a 100-foot radius? Dog and handler certainly were trained in how to bilk the stupider. bleeding heart PETA parts of our population out of hundreds of thousands of dollars each year. What if those who thought this was a ridiculous, wasteful, unne...

Will Howard Hansel please weigh in?

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The Trail has now yielded its editorial pages to an outside editor (with no newspaper or editorial experience, imagine). I'm anxious to hear what Herr Howard has in mind to over-overturn the recent Supreme Court decision. The Trail is a national paper, after all. It used to contain just local news, but then Howard took over, and Howard is a man of the world. Worldly, you might say. We are going to be drug into this, whether we want it or not. Howard is in charge now.

Remember when the Trail used to alert us to large outbreaks?

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Remember when Cheley Camp blamed all outbreaks on importations? That doesn't happen anymore, in the former case, and in the latter case, that no longer holds water (actually, it never did, but Tim and Mike R. slide on their bellies to please their advertisers, regardless of how many innocents die in the process). Stay far, far away from Cheley Camp. 31 active cases among staff at Camp Wet Spot and Good Feeling?

Is ColoTim of Holy Hill the Covid Bandit?

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Last name provided in next post.

Good to see Denver is covering Estes Park news

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Even with the Trail's Denver Post connection, Tim is too busy not reporting on Covid to not report on drive-bys that impact area families. Maybe Jason will cover it for the town later today. Eventually, we will rename the Trail the Stanley Town Crier

Technically, it passed spell-check

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Maybe Tampa Bay needs to take a few more good dumps before Game #3. And lest you think this was posted on some minor-league sports website, here is a screen grab, headline plus photo. I give them five minutes before this paragraph is updated or an intern gets fired.

The latest COVID non-news from Tom Godhelpus

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The biggest news of the week is the county's move on the CDC dashboard, which is extremely forgiving, and much more relaxed thant the previous dashboard parameters, to HIGH RISK. Not only did Tom Godhelpus bury the lede, he said these numbers WOULD move it to HIGH RISK, as if he is somehow standing next to the dial and holding it back from moving like grabbing the second hand on a watch. These numbers DID move Larimer County into HIGH RISK, Tom. They aren't a maybe. You changed the definition of HIGH RISK to make it harder to move into HIGH RISK, then when the county moved into HIGH RISK anyway, you didn't ever say "The County is now in HIGH RISK" because you don't know what to do about it. Just stand around and watch people drop like flies, apparently.

One month ago, Estes Park cleared 2000 cases

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One month ago. It is silly/sad the Trail-Gazette has said NOTHING about the largest one-month increase in cases in Estes Park since SARS-CoV-2 was identified. Over 300 positives in one month. But Mike Romero knows on which side his butt is buttered.