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This puzzling bit of extraneii included in the DA’s report is proof positive that our chief of police isn’t training officers correctly. It’s not so much the beginner’s mistake of not searching for these things on your wife’s cellphone, or planting things on her search history like “How do I pull off a ‘Gone Girl’?”, it is that everyone on our local police force knows they will still collect their pension and overtime while in prison. This is part of the introductory handbook.   If Wes isn’t demonstrating headshots as the faster and less painful way out during orientation, since so many of our recruits will find themselves facing this dilemma sometime in their Estes Park careers, he is derelict in his duty.   So let’s see, this guy Rose is an evil genius, can outwit our local Johnny Laws because he is always one step ahead of them, yet he doesn’t carry a standard issue cyanide tablet to bite down on when questioned too firmly about excessive bribes from drug dealers (you know,...

But we can sure jabber our jaws when our job is in jeopardy, right, chief? Let’s cut to the chase:  Here was a guy allegedly beating his wife to a pulp for the last 20 years, and this September was the first anyone in town (specifically on the police force) ever heard of or suspected it? The legwork on all of this was done by the family, and let’s not kid ourselves, Wes Kufeld brought in CIRT not through any initiative of his own, but because he was specifically told to while Fort Collins was chewing him a new one. Note to criminals:  Estes Park is a great place to set up shop, because the police department apparently can’t even savvy what is going on under their own noses.

and their property in Stanley Circle connected with the Estes Park Hospital? Did the Chungs accidentally or purposefully provide this link to EPH.org? Did the Buzzfile aggregator somehow glitch? Or is this really true? I'll just post what turns up from a simple search below, and let someone else with more intelligence or insight spell this out. 

The Estes Park Trail-Gazette building is unoccupied.  Has been for weeks.  They used to staff it with a skeleton crew of one during some weekdays, but now, Black Lantern has moved out of the complex, and the only cars parked in the lot are contractors and carpenters preparing for new tenants. The paper is obviously still being produced twice a week, as usual, but the reporting is sent in electronically, the layout/composition done from home, and the actual paper printed down in Berthoud, in the Lehman facility (home to the Loveland Reporter-Herald, closed to the public since March), also a "public unwelcome" facility. Who really cares if the public isn't allowed in to see any of the sausage being produced, or contribute any suggestions as to the flavor of sausage these entities churn out. Well, we all should, because things that tout themselves as "community papers" should at least attempt to represent the community.  As of late, any calls to any Trail-Gazette t...

Today, COVID-19 cases in Estes Park reached the magical number of 1045, and the "cases/100K" metric teetered on the brink of 10,000.  This is a significant moment, because it tells us (somewhat counterintuitively, but try to keep up) how many people live in Estes Park.  You would think we could determine how many people live in Estes Park by counting them, as, for example, during the every-10-years federal census.  But why should we waste time and money on that?  We can just make up a number much more easily... The "Cases/100K" metric is calculated by dividing the number of cases in a town or city by the population of that town or city, and then multiplying that number by 100,000. So in the case of Estes Park, at this moment of "total eclipse" the calculation is easy, and doesn't even require a calculator. For "cases/100K" to be at 10,000, that means the cases in Estes Park have to equal 1/10 of the population (since 10,000 is 1/10 of 100,000...

to remind him, "Um, Dan, remember when you said a prediction of three million deaths in the United States from COVID-19 was 'fear mongering'?"  That was when deaths in the United States had passed 300,000.  Now they are at 750,000.  So back then, it was 10% of a number you couldn't comprehend, and refused to consider.  Now it is 25% of that same number.   I'm sure you won't admit yourself proven wrong until you breathe your last breath, and my guess is, even at that point, you will slip your nurse (because your family won't be allowed into the room) a note that says "None of this is real - We are all victims of the military-industrial complex and big pharma". Of course we are, little Danny boy.  You will get your cotton candy and everything Santa promised, because you are special.  So special.

The latest case Estes Park reported by Larimer County caused the abrupt dismissal of one of the Estes Park Elementary kindergarten classes this afternoon, with recommendations to worried parents to quarantine their children and get them tested.  This is standard SNAFU, and I feel terrible for the school system, with no vaccines available for this age group, but feel even worse for having to deal with parents who won't get their children vaccinated even when vaccines become available. In the sky with diamonds I was recently speaking with an Estes Park Trail-Gazette reporter (yes, they still have one) about the likelihood for another wasted year in the Estes Park school system.  In that case, it was a 5th grade class from Denver taking an ill-advised field trip to Cheley Colorado Camps, which led to a 7-person outbreak and a lengthy recommended quarantine.  The local paper didn't cover that outbreak (despite it being handed to them by a Denver Post reporter - Instead, they ...

Why is Estes Park Health one of seven hospitals in the state that has thus far failed to comply with vaccine requirements?  Are we running a hospital in this town, are we spending millions on an actual hospital, or are we instead no better than a summer camp first aid station?  Better hold another executive session, hospital board Brainiacs.  Maybe you can hire some locum tenens vaccinists along with your failed hospitalists and surgicalists.   Report your numbers, EPH - How Freaking Hard Is It?

Are one of these the services where our departed captain announced that his wife was in the hospital?

TAB, the defunct, saccharine-laced, cancer-inducing diet soft drink, all of that badness is back and in full force with Estes Park's TAB, the maskless group that controls town purse strings through advocacy and the latest Reader's Digest-supplied environmental punchcards.   Here is how TAB saw 2021 parking.  Hint - They want to INCREASE the $2/hour rates downtown.  It is simply not enough to be twice as expensive as Denver, you must actively chase people away, and until are streets are deserted in July, TAB hasn't done its job protecting the world from congestion and driving more than 20 feet to find a space (Note - Most people come from more than 20 feet away to visit Estes Park - Should we restrict visitors to those within walking distance?) Read their un-elected, who appointed these bozos recommendations Here and Here My only question is:  When is the town going to appoint a subcommittee to look into animal names and their impact on people's willingness to sp...

Hypocrisy levels dangerously high.  Larimer County has finally, finally implemented a mask mandate.  Sort of.  They needed to pack in one more good weekend of retail sales, so that sales tax isn't impacted and all 30 employees at the Estes Valley Library can keep their part-time jobs.  I love the "Thank goodness" comment from our Mayor.  For those who don't know the mayor, it comes across as a "thank goodness" of relief, like, finally, someone in Larimer County government has come to their senses.  We are dying up here for no reason, but finally, finally, we have convinced Larimer County to adopt what we have always followed, mandate or not. Or not.  Let's count the number of folks wearing masks around this Estes Park town hall table back in August.  None, none, none, none.  I'm counting none.  Or are all the participants instead wearing invisa-masks? The town didn't need to wait on Larimer County to put a mask mandate in place.  In...

The Estes Park Police Department is having some trouble distinguishing the good guys from the bad guys, and so provided this "help wanted" poster assembled from in-store security cameras for suspects in two recent hypocrisies, umm, robberies, something.  Eye patch may be wishful thinking.   One of these things is not like the other.  One of these things just doesn't belong. If you have any information about how stairs can be made safer so that spouses aren't constantly falling down them, you can remain anonymous, hell, you can commit "victimless" crimes of your own for years and years without repercussions, provided you drink heavily and agree to black out frequently.

That is the owner of the Taffy Shop on West Elkhorn, Mark Igel. Mark Igel is currently tilting at the parking windmill, which I recognized as something that couldn't be reversed once it was implemented last year, and just started walking to work.  Come next Monday, though, I will plant my car gleefully right in the midst of the former paid parking spots, and not worry about the "squishy" GPS equipment that can't tell if you have been parking in the same spot for three hours, in one spot for one hour and the neighboring spot for two hours, or in three adjacent spots, each for one hour.  Of course, if you want to complain and get this problem rectified on the spot, you can't stop the Yellow Pee, or whatever it is called, because the driver has been instructed to take evasive action and quickly speed away from anyone waving an inappropriately issued ticket and/or pointing out their incompetence.  Rather, your complaints will be handled by a call center in Grozny, Eas...